Disclaimer: This post may contain affiliate links, meaning I may receive a portion of the proceeds from any purchases made through my blog. Thank you for supporting Lovely & Lazy!
Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love of all kinds. Unfortunately, one of the types of love I see drastically underrepresented on V-Day is self-love!
I love being in a relationship, but I also love myself. Valentine’s Day as its portrayed in the media doesn’t allow much space for both: either you’re blissfully happy in a relationship or you’re miserably single. There’s no room to love yourself and your partner, or to love being on your own.
Thankfully, things are changing, thanks to the rise of women writers on sites like Bustle and Refinery29 telling our stories the way we see them. However, I still wanted to take a moment to appreciate self-love here on Lovely & Lazy!
As a woman in a relationship, I think it’s important to remember that being in a relationship is about two whole people coming together — not finding someone to “complete you.” And that’s what practicing self-love is all about, and why I’m advocating for buying yourself a self-love gift this Valentine’s Day.
Read on to check out my list of little gifts that you can buy yourself this February 14th to enhance your practice of self-love!
Valentine’s Day is the perfect time of year to get intentional about self-love and gratitude. Now, ban.do has launched a line of intention candles (to go with its bestselling necklaces) for you to light to reaffirm your goals in the New Year. Get yours for $38 at ban.do — and don’t forget to use my link for $10 off your order of $20 or more. Click here!
Here’s a scary stat: there’s more than a 20% orgasm gap between the number of times men and women climax during sexual activity. In case you haven’t heard it lately, you deserve to orgasm just as often as a man — even if that means taking matters into your own hands! Last year, Bellesa launched a Valentine’s Day campaign where they donated money to Planned Parenthood for every view of a porn video on their website. Grab yourself a $29 Satisfyer from their boutique and get ready to participate.
Why wear lingerie to look good for a guy when you could wear it to love the way you look in the mirror? Don’t wait for your S.O. to buy you something slinky and lacy for Valentine’s Day — buy yourself something, and keep it all to yourself! Auden is the latest (affordable) lingerie brand that Target-lovers are raving about; you can get a sexy red babydoll for just $22. Try it on, look at yourself in the mirror and try saying to yourself out loud, “Damn, I look good!” Welcome to your new favorite self-care practice.
Scent is powerful; it can trigger negative memories or help us create positive new ones. I suspect that’s one of the reasons why perfume is such a popular gift on Valentine’s Day: so you associate the smell with your S.O. whenever you wear it. For a twist on the classic tradition, buy yourself perfume and spritz it on as part of your self-care routine. Whenever you wear one of these fragrances from all-natural brand Skylar, you’ll think of your commitment to loving yourself and feel reaffirmed in your mission. Get the Skylar Perfume Palette for $20 at Sephora.
One of the best ways to get to know yourself is from the inside-out. As a writer, I might be biased, but I love writing in a journal as a way to get into my own head and get to the bottom of what I’m thinking and feeling. This guided journal by self-help guru and yogi Elena Brower is titled Practice You in honor of the thing you do best every day: just being yourself! The $15 guided journal is available at Amazon, and will help you get started with journaling by prompting you to answer questions that will make you recognize the best in yourself.
Need to wash something (or someone) out of your hair? A cleansing bath or shower is often just what you need to rid yourself of toxic vibes. Practice self-love by taking a long, hot bath or shower using this stitched bar soap (available for $9 at Anthropologie). Take time to enjoy the scent and steaminess as you revel in your sacred alone time. As you run the soap along your body, don’t forget to take a moment to say “thank you” for everything your bod does for you! Even if you don’t love the way you look, you can always find it in your heart to accept yourself as you are presently — and that, my friends, is the first step toward unconditional self-love.
We schedule date nights with our significant others — but why not with ourselves? Whether it’s a drop-in yoga class you’ve been dying to try or a movie that no one but you wants to see, scheduling dates with yourself is one of the best ways to become comfortable spending time in your own skin. You are your own best company, so buy yourself this $8 date night jar at American Eagle this Valentine’s Day and start dropping your spare change in. Once you’re ready to cash out, use the money to treat yourself to a special self-care date all by yourself! At last, a date that doesn’t come with an argument about what to get for dinner….
You don’t need a partner to enjoy the aphrodisiac scents in this $8 Lush bath bomb! You don’t even need to be having sex to reap the benefits of its sensual energy. Use the Sex Bomb during a self-care bath to infuse yourself with magical, sexual energy and to encourage yourself to practice self-love. Soon, you’ll find yourself absorbing confidence and feeling ready to take on the world with your newly-heightened sex appeal.
There’s nothing like savoring a delicious piece of chocolate to help you be more mindful — there’s even a famous chocolate meditation dedicated to the practice of mindfulness! For $5 at Thrive Market, you can treat yourself to a batch of sweet, luxurious, all-natural truffles made with the finest chocolate earth has to offer. Really notice the color, scent, texture and flavor of the chocolate as you dig in, one piece at a time, for a unique and delicious self-love practice you won’t soon forget.